I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
