guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize