It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
