I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
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i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
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"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
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