I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
