Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
