Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
