she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole