when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
