Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
there was a trapeze. enough said
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
