It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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