No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I'm getting married
To pizza
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Randomize
