What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
