I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
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