she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize