hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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