do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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