Dual....:-)
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
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I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
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do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
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