What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Randomize
