Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
