Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Randomize
