Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
