yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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