This dress was meant to end up on your floor
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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