well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
