Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Just pee around me
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
