the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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