and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Operation Purity has been aborted
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
