ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
