THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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