i jhust puked up my retainher.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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