whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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