Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
