Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
