i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Randomize
