He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
