I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe he injected his testicle?
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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