I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Dicks are not precious.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
