I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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