You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Randomize