why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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