summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
