hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
