you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
so much tequila, so little girl.
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