Christians are straight up FREAKS
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
