wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize