You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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