You can't motorboat a personality
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
COCAINE IS GR8
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