She is in my trunk
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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