So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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