It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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